Reality.

I have a new boyfriend :) Aidan, we met at work and we've being together for 3 weeks now. He loves Emma and he loves me, he sees me all the time we can talk on the phone for hours. Theirs just one thing, and its pretty big. Its his insecurity. Im going out tommorow night because its my best friends birthday and all hes talking about is me cheating on him! Constantly, which makes women want to do it more. He told me he will never trust me so whats the point in a relationship!?

The past few weeks i have being thinking alot about Emmas dad, and ive realised that deep down i do still love him. No matter what he did to me or how much he hurt me, he also meant a lot to me he was my first love. So im finally going through the grieving process of loosing my love because ive always being so busy when i was pregnant and being a single mum. Its hard, very very hard because i know hes not good for me or Emma. But i also know if it wasnt for Emma id still be with him and my life would have being in pieces, so in a way having her has saved me! Shes the love of my life and i know i have to put him behind us but im finding it difficult. Expecially when Aidan's being so untrusting towards me.


My job is going great, although the hours are so tiring, i wake up at 5am to catch the bus for 6.30 and i get home at 7pm so its a really long day and i miss Emma like crazy but its going to be worth it. One day im going to be able to afford a house for me and Emma, and buy her all the things she deserves and i cant wait!